How to Deal With an Ex That Keeps Making False Accusations

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After a divorce or a breakup, your partner might choose to get back at you by making false accusations. These accusations could affect your emotional well being; your partner might spread lies that damage your reputation or make you feel bad about yourself. Under more extreme cases, false accusations can affect child custody disputes and false criminal accusations can land you in jail. Fortunately, there are both legal and non-legal steps you can take to avoid the damaging affects of false accusations.

Proceed carefully when dealing with false accusations. Serious accusations can lead to jail time, fines, community service and a destroyed reputation.

Speak with an attorney. The attorney will give you advice on the evidence that can be presented that can help have your case dismissed. Your attorney may be needed to cast doubt on the false accusation, if the only two witnesses in the situation you are being accused of are you and your ex.

Find someone who witnessed the event that your ex is making allegations about. Have that witness testify against your ex. If your ex accused you of being at a place at a particular time, find an alibi who can verify that you were somewhere else.

Look for inconsistencies in your ex’s story that proves that your ex is not telling the truth. Consider any elements of your ex’s story that are impossible.

Determine why your ex is making these accusations. If you know your ex really well, you may be able to determine why your ex is lying. However, keep in mind that your theory is not yet proven and merely a possibility. If you do not know why your ex is making false accusations, consult friends and family members of your ex or consult with a psychologist.

Ask someone who knows you well to testify to your typical behavior. For example, if you are accused of sexual assault, find someone you have had sexual relations with and have them testify to your character.

Tell the prosecutor that the charges are baseless and that you will fight them without relent, in the event that the case is taken to court. People tend to find the allegedly abused to be more sympathetic, so prosecutors are more likely to aggressively pursue a conviction of the accused.


  • If you have actually committed the acts that you have been accused of, you should admit to wrongdoing, change your behavior and ask for forgiveness.


About the Author

Chuck Robert specializes in nutrition, marketing, nonprofit organizations and travel. He has been writing since 2007, serving as a ghostwriter and contributing to online publications. Robert holds a Master of Arts with a dual specialization in literature and composition from Purdue University.